The Intellectual Masturbater

"Don't knock [intellectual] masturbation, it's [intellectual] sex with someone I love." -Woody Allen
"Blogging is intellectual masturbation." -The Intellectual Masturbater

Friday, March 31, 2006

Hum Do Hamare Shunya

Looks like nobody wants to have kids anymore in Europe. They say that in Europe, 2.1 children per woman is the population replacement level. Of the ten countries shown in the article above, the average birth rate is 1.62. They're falling half a child short per woman. The only question that's in my mind is how much longer before the world only consists of Indians and Chinese?

Thursday, March 30, 2006

This dummy is going places!

1 set of used blue scrubs: $10
1 old gray sweatshirt stuffed with newspaper: $5
1 Styrofoam head: $1
Getting pulled over for driving alone in the HOV lane with a dummy made from the above ingredients: Priceless

And that's what happened to Denver local Greg Pringle (no, this is not a joke). Read about it here in the NYT. The dummy is called 'Tillie'.

As punishment, he was ordered by the judge to stand at a busy intersection holding a sign that said, "HOV lane is not for dummies." And also, he auctioned off the dummy on Ebay to the firm Video Professor for $15,000, who in turn, are going to auction it off again. Pringle had to donate the proceeds to a National Safety Council campaign as part of his sentence. Video Professor plans to do the same. After sprucing Tillie up a bit, though...

Vintage ToonCast

A great place where you can watch vintage cartoons from the good ol' days (before we were born). If you're into animation, this is the place for you. They even have an Itunes podcasting link...

Deep Shit - Addendum

Regarding the article in the OpinionJournal I talked about and quoted below, an addendum: I'm not sure if I totally agree with that cartoon of a guy whose turban is unraveling into cobras which are attacking the supposedly US helicopter. First off, I thought we Indians had the monopoly on the stereotype of the turbaned guy. [Well, ok, perhaps after 9/11 and Osama's entry into US mainstream, that kind of tilted the turban balance towards the Arabs.] But what about the cobras? Aren't we desis still the snake-charmers? I vividly remember chatting with my mid-western freshman-year neighbour in my dorm and he asked me, "Can you charm snakes, dude? It'd be tits if you could!" I'm quoting verbatim, here...

Deep Shit

That's what America is in, as far Hassan Abbasi is concerned. This is a guy known as the "professor of strategy" and "Dr. Kissinger of Islam" to his friends. He's foreign policy adviser to Mahmoud Ahmadinejad - freely elected president of Iran and anti-semitist (at least in his rhetoric) extraordinaire.

An article in today's WSJ OpinionJournal talks about his vision of a helicopter holding the last platoon of US Marines narrowly escaping gunfire while fleeing from Iraq.
To hear Mr. Abbasi tell it the entire recent history of the U.S. could be narrated with the help of the image of "the last helicopter." It was that image in Saigon that concluded the Vietnam War under Gerald Ford. Jimmy Carter had five helicopters fleeing from the Iranian desert, leaving behind the charred corpses of eight American soldiers. Under Ronald Reagan the helicopters carried the corpses of 241 Marines murdered in their sleep in a Hezbollah suicide attack. Under the first President Bush, the helicopter flew from Safwan, in southern Iraq, with Gen. Norman Schwarzkopf aboard, leaving behind Saddam Hussein's generals, who could not believe why they had been allowed live to fight their domestic foes, and America, another day. Bill Clinton's helicopter was a Black Hawk, downed in Mogadishu and delivering 16 American soldiers into the hands of a murderous crowd.

According to this theory, President George W. Bush is an "aberration," a leader out of sync with his nation's character and no more than a brief nightmare for those who oppose the creation of an "American Middle East." Messrs. Abbasi and Ahmadinejad have concluded that there will be no helicopter as long as George W. Bush is in the White House. But they believe that whoever succeeds him, Democrat or Republican, will revive the helicopter image to extricate the U.S. from a complex situation that few Americans appear to understand.
Sounds bleak...

Raghav FM Mansoorpur 1

An electrician in Bihar started a radio station in Bihar using transmission equipment costing a little over $1. Even though it was only transmitted within a 12 mile radius, it had a listnership of thousands (thanks to our most populous state). I think that's pretty cool - another example of the resourcefulness and inventiveness of our desi populace. But now, our esteemed government wants to shut it down because he was operating without a license. Because the BBC has publicized it as much as it has though, I think that it will survive the onslaught. Let's see...

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

This Line is Dead

Apparently, people want to be buried or cremated with their mobile phones these days. The question really is: Can you hear them now?

Britney Spears NUDE in NYC!!

It's true! This is not a joke. There's a sculpture of Britney Spears giving birth on a bearksin rug (I kid you not!) to be unveiled at the Capla Kesting Gallery tomorrow. It's supposed to be a statement for pro-life. Here's an easier way to make a statement about pro-life: "I'm pro-life." Got to admit though, it's not as interesting as a statue of Britney Spears giving birth on a bearskin rug!

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

Illegal Immigration

In light of Dubya's recent guest worker program gaining ground, and Krugman ($$) voicing out against illegal immigration, its refreshing that Jagdish Bhagwati, economist extraordinaire and potential Nobel laureate (you heard it here, first!) supported ($$) illegal immigration for Foreign Affairs in 2003. But his comments still ring true today. He says
Migration lies at the center of global problems today. Rich countries are trying to attract skilled immigrants and keep unskilled ones out; poor countries are trying to keep skilled labor at home. Both sides are doomed to fail. Governments must stop trying to curtail migration and start managing it to seek benefits for all.

JP Morgan in India

India is certainly shining in JP Morgan's eyes. They are looking to increase their presence by hiring another 4,000 desis to work for them. It doesn't contribute much to the India vs. China debate though, because they're also looking to hire in China...

Monday, March 27, 2006

The Peaceful Parsis

There's a naked statue of the Parsi prophet Zarathusthra to be recently unveiled in Sydney, Australia. Now, unlike some other religions that shall remain unnamed, the Parsis will not go about rioting and burning down Australian consulates around the world. Here's why.

Do you feel dumb? Blame Google.

An article in yesterday's Times OpEd, discusses how search engines today are not making people much smarter. Citation analysis is the practice of judging the quality of an article by the number of times it's cited in other articles. Putting its inherent ethics aside, Google works in a similar fashion by ranking websites by the number of links to the site. However, the results displayed have the opposite issue: they are too disperse. That is, irrelevant and sometimes nonsensical results are displayed side-by-side with relevant ones. Check out the article. It's interesting.

Why is Windows so slow?

Because it's too big and tries to do too much - that's why! An article in today's NYT explains not only why Windows is so slow, but also why the release of the new Microsoft Windows Vista has just been pushed back to January.

Friday, March 24, 2006

Tom Friedman and the Dubai ports issue

So it all started with Dubya announcing that a Dubai company was all lined up to take over handling certain (non-security-related) functions in US ports. Then, because of a huge hulabaloo caused by the Dems in Congress citing "security concerns," the company itself backed out of the deal, leading to speculation that this would worsen US-MidEast relations.

Tom Friedman in his March 15th NYT column, wrote that
What is so crazy about the Dubai ports issue is that Dubai is precisely the sort of decent, modernizing model we should be trying to nurture in the Arab-Muslim world. But we've never really had an honest discussion about either the real problems out there or the real solutions, have we?
Now today, an article in The Plank, TNR's blog, Martin Peretz says that Tom Friedman was wrong about Dubai, by citing an article about Asian workers in Dubai rioting from the NYT:

Some 2,500 Asian workers angered by what they described as low salaries and mistreatment smashed cars and offices in a riot on Tuesday evening that interrupted construction on the Burj Dubai, meant to be the world's tallest skyscraper. ... In sympathy, thousands of laborers building a terminal at Dubai International Airport also laid down their tools.

Firstly, I'm fairly sure given the large numbers of Indians emigrating to Dubai, that "Asian" means Indian, or at least, South Asian. Secondly, while I am in no way condoning this behavior, I do believe that it's a reaction to some form of oppression on a minority population. Working on anecdotal evidence from friends who are/were there, I understand that Indians are not treated on an equal standing in that society. This is not the first time that an oppressed minority has reacted violently. And certainly, a minority riot is no standard by which to judge how a company would do its job. I mean, if that were the case then we shouldn't be doing any business with American or French firms.

I do still think that these here, fine United States are still the best place in the world to be a foreigner and/or a minority. But sometimes it looks like Americans are just flailing their hands about in the dark and everyone (both, those who should and those who shouldn't) are getting hit by them. It's disappointing.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Stripping down the perqs?

Seems that Wall St. execs can no longer hold "meetings" in strip clubs. Thanks to the lawsuits brought on by female execs...
She writhes and rubs her nearly naked body against as many as seven men, doing "lap dances" for $400 an hour. (The room costs an additional $200 for the hour.) Hart, who once worked for a venture-capital firm, always asks what brought the men together. They often say they're having a meeting.

"I say, 'You're having a business meeting in a strip club?' " Hart says in an interview in the dressing room at Rick's Cabaret here.

It's not just strippers who have questions. Some women on Wall Street want to know how it can be fair — or legal — for their managers and male colleagues to exclude them when they fraternize at strip clubs, often with the women's clients.

What if Microsoft made the Ipod?

Answer: here.
And surprise, surprise. Guess who made the video?

No Chef on South Park

Not really a die-hard fan of the series although I do watch once in a while. I like the fact that they pretty much ridicule everything in America, no holds barred. But I am a fan of Isaac Hayes. The guy has been in the forefront of the music business for several decades. You have to admire that. Anyhow, he seems to be really tired these days, because he quit South Park when they lampooned Scientology (he's a Scientologist). Here's what the co-creator of the show had to say:
Co-creator Stone said Hayes would be released from his contract and had the best wishes of the South Park team.

Stone said: "In 10 years and over 150 episodes of South Park, Isaac never had a problem with the show making fun of Christians, Muslim, Mormons or Jews.

"He got a sudden case of religious sensitivity when it was his religion featured on the show."
Hmmm...interesting. Because then they go on to make him a paedophile and kill him off, in true South Park style. Those bastards! ;)

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Secret Journalists

Journalists go undercover to break a story. Undercover agents act as journalists to ensure security. Now all we need is to have vice-presidents shoot their friends while hunting and Michael Jackson to take up residence in the Middle East. Oh, wait a sec...

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

We are like this only...

Prince Roy, a US visa consulate officer stationed in Madras nostalgizes about desi talkings and such...

Sidewalk Drawings

You will not believe the realism involved with these Sidewalk Drawings. Amazing!

India's rupee looking good on the markets...

Chuck Butler, columnist at The Daily Reckoning had some good things to say about the rupee.
There was big news, overnight, about India's currency, the rupee. Now, a lot of you know that we've shied away from the rupee because of its 'non-deliverable' status. Well, that could all change in the future, if the stories this morning are bang on.
The dollar, on the other hand, doesn't seem to be looking that good according to the Free Market News Network. What can the Fed do about it?

Speaking of the falling dollar, does anyone realize that with the rising US debt and the never-ending Iraq war, that this war is being funded by other countries? China, for one.
It is not the first empire to rely on financing from its rivals - the English counted on the United States to pay for World War I - but it is the first empire, ever, to squander its borrowed money and its military strength in a war against nobody.
More here at the FMNN's summary of The Daily Reckoning.

Bushism of the Day

Slate gives us the Bushism of the day.
'After the bombing, most Iraqis saw what the perpetuators of this attack were trying to do.'—(On the bombing of the Golden Mosque of Samarra in Iraq) March 13, 2006, Washington, D.C.
You know, that *really* clarifies it for me. Because up until the bombings, even I was wondering what the perpetuators of the attack were trying to do...

Sunday, March 19, 2006

Family killed for witchcraft in Assam

This was on the BBC today.
A family of five has been beheaded in Sonitpur district, north-east India, by a mob who accused them of witchcraft.

The tea plantation worker and his four children had been blamed for causing a disease which killed two other workers and made many unwell in Assam state.

About 200 villagers tried and sentenced the family in an unofficial court, then publicly beheaded them with machetes.

They then marched to a police station with the heads, chanting slogans denouncing witchcraft and black magic.

Enough said...

Saturday, March 18, 2006

Brit child abuse in India...

Two Brits were arrested in India for child abuse. Pretty damn disgusting. It's somewhat reassuring to know that they do enforce child abuse laws in India, though...

Friday, March 17, 2006

Biased BBC

The BBC? Biased? Not a chance!

Indian Food Delivery

It's Indian food delivery in the US! For the Bay Area, it's more organized. You can order off of annadaata.com. For other areas it's not so straightforward. Check out this article in today's NYT.

Celebrate Pi Day

A bit late in the coming since Pi Day was 3/14 1:59pm (pi = 3.14159...), but what the hey. For all you math geeks out there: Celebrate Pi Day!. Some steps:

Step 1: Create some pi ambiance. Just like people display a tree and mistletoe, wear Christmas gear, and sing Christmas songs around Christmas, there is a lot of room for making the environment around you reminiscent of pi. Probably the favorite of most is to wear a pi t-shirt--this idea can be taken further to include pi jewelry (maybe a necklace whose beads represent the numbers in pi), a pi mug or clock, or other pi paraphernalia.

Step 2: Convert things into pi. This step is absolutely necessary for two reasons: To utterly confuse people who have no idea what you are talking about (thus opening the door for enlightenment) and to have fun seeing how many things can be referenced with pi.

And my favorite:
Step 4: Eat pi foods. Many creative ways exist to do this. First, there's the punny approach, like eating pineapple, pizza, or pine nuts and drinking pina coladas or pineapple juice. Second, there's the shape approach, like making cookies or pancakes shaped like pi or making a pie with a pi cut out of the center of the crust.


More here.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Gandhian Opera

Phillip Glass composed an opera about the life of Gandhi in S. Africa and called it 'Satyagraha'. He did this in the 80s. It's finally being performed in England now. In Sanskrit. Why Sanskrit?
...composer Glass used the Sanskrit text because it allowed him to communicate through sound without "the limitations of literal meaning".
So now Sanskrit has no literal meaning? Ok, perhaps I"m getting a little defensive - so not many people will understand it. But I still think he could have said it in a better way.

I'm a big fan of Glass' work in the Koyaanisqatsi trilogy and even his collaboration with Ravi Shankar. But an opera on Gandhi's life? An opera?

Should be interesting to see how it's received.

Cafe Salemba

Interesting blog by a bunch of (I guess) econ students of which at least one is from Harvard. I like it. Here's the description:
We serve food for thoughts: from Marshallian Pie to Equilibrium Croissant to Keynes Liberated. On weekends, we have life music by Monetary Swing and Separating Hyperplane.
Got to be an econ geek to understand the punning involved there. Check it out. I liked it (did I mention that already?).

Three articles about SEX!!

The subject got your attention, didn't it? Well, might as well tell you that there's no nudity. It's just that I came across three (count 'em) articles about sex in my usual procrastinatory surfing activities.

This one in the LA Times, talks about safety in the bathhouses in LA which are known for their use as a place for a casual romp, mostly for gays.

This one on the newly minted Guardian's public blog (worth clicking on this link just to take a look at the site) talks about why the Bush administration does not like sex. Well, its actually about the Senate debate on the morning-after pill.

And finally, this one talks about Indian sexuality from a historical perspective and tries to explain how the hell the country that invented the Kama Sutra became so goddam conservative. He blames the muslims...who doesn't these days?

A picture says a thousand words...

This pic on the Ace of Spades HQ actually just says one word...

No more specialists

With the merger of the NYSE with Archipelago, there's talk that the specialists will now be eliminated as far as trading of ETFs (or Exchange Traded Funds) are concerned.

If you know anything about finance and trading on the NYSE, then you know that the "specialists" are those traders who match buyers with sellers on the trading floor. They also have (somewhat) of a say in what the bid and ask prices are. In fact, some years ago a bunch of financial economists discovered that some market makers (what specialists are called on the NASDAQ exchange) were setting the ask prices only in even-eights (that is, 2/8, 4/8, etc.) to boost their own profits on the trades.

So perhaps reducing the hold of these specialists is a good thing. Then again, if this is a signal of things to come, and if, at some point in the future, specialists are eliminated entirely, then with their departure will go a centuries-old tradition on the exchange floor.

Technology has radically altered the way financial instruments are priced and traded. Both in terms of the ease of computational efficiency with faster processors as well as the ease of trading over the internet. A lot of things are going to change drastically in the next decade as far as the exchanges are concerned.

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Friedman does it again...

Friedman never ceases to amaze me. Rarely (if ever) does one see an American journalist with such insight and understanding into complex international issues.
The real problem was recently spelled out by an Arab-American psychiatrist, Dr. Wafa Sultan, in a stunning interview with Al Jazeera. Speaking about the Arab-Muslim world, Dr. Sultan said: 'The clash we are witnessing ... is not a clash of religions, or a clash of civilizations. It is a clash between two opposites, between two eras. It is a clash between a mentality that belongs to the Middle Ages and another mentality that belongs to the 21st century. It is a clash between civilization and backwardness, between the civilized and the primitive, between barbarity and rationality. It is a clash between freedom and oppression, between democracy and dictatorship. It is a clash between human rights, on the one hand, and the violation of these rights, on the other hand. It is a clash between those who treat women like beasts, and those who treat them like human beings.'

The Jazeera host then asked: 'I understand from your words that what is happening today is a clash between the culture of the West, and the backwardness and ignorance of the Muslims?'

And then he goes on to say:
President Bush keeps talking about Iraq and the Arab world as if democracy alone is the cure and all we need to do is get rid of a few bad apples. The problem is much deeper — we're dealing with a civilization that is still highly tribalized and is struggling with modernity. Mr. Bush was right in thinking it is important to help Iraq become a model where Arab Muslims could freely discuss their real problems, the ones identified by Dr. Sultan, and chart new courses. His crime was thinking it would be easy.


Amazing. It's so easy to either fall into the trap of being "patriotic" or being "politic." By "patriotic," I mean the usual banter of jingoism and xenophoba that underlies most discussions about international issues these days (ranging from outright hatred towards all Indians for outsourcing jobs to reneging on port deals between the US and Dubai). And by "politic," I mean when the leftists go against the rightists or vice-versa without any rationale behind it other than the fact that someone is either a conservative or a liberal. Friedman *never* does that. Every one of his opinions is well thought out and clearly expressed. Brilliant.

Oh yeah, I forgot about those who sit on the fence. That's probably the worst of the three. Not willing to make an informed decision on a particular topic because they're just too lazy or ignorant. Most likely, one leading to the other.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Running alone isn't good for you...

A new study shows that running alone might cause neural degeneration in rats. But when the same rats ran in a group, there was neural generation. So running alone is bad for you. Ok, I say. Then run with a rat.

Caveat: For you long distance runners out there (myself included), we don't have to worry.
When isolated rats ran for a long time, they did see the same brain benefits as their short-term runner peers - but only when they had been running for a much longer period.

Miles to go...

Miles Davis makes it into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Posthumous controversies persist in Mile's life. I'm all for it. Granted, his genre was Jazz, but certainly with Bitches Brew he ventured into the world of jazz-rock fusion. One in which is guitarist for that album -John McLaughlin- was (is) quite familiar with.

The NYT agrees with me. They say:

Critics of the choice argue that Mr. Davis was a jazzman — not a rocker — and accuse the hall of misappropriating a major jazz deity and of muddying up the musicological picture. But muddying up traditional categories is what this genre-bending musician was all about, especially in the latter part of his long career.

Right on...

Engineers get creative

Some guys from the Design Program at IIT Kanpur created this music video. The video is all right, but the song is damn catchy. I like what they've done. A creative way to channel one's energies during (I guess) exam week. Thought I would give them some free publicity.

PS: It's in hindi (FYI) for you non-Indians out there.

Sunday, March 12, 2006

Rang De Basanti comes to life

Model tends bar in Delhi. Model refuses to serve politician's son a drink. Model gets shot. Politician's son gets away with it. Model's parents get together and protest her murder.

Ok, so perhaps its not Rang De Basanti exactly. I mean, it's not an Air Force pilot who got killed. But it's still protests against an unjust killing organized by parents of the victim. A rare occurrence on the Indian landscape...

Thursday, March 09, 2006

No flies in his ointment...

It's quite a relief (note: sarcasm) that there aren't any animal parts in this guru's medicines.

Addendum: Got to apologize for no posts in the last week. I'm traveling and have been really busy. Give me a couple more days and you'll soon be seeing the wonderful, entertaining, intelligent, witty, sharp... you get the picture, I'm sure. [Sometimes, I can get a little carried away...;)]